ORTAINED?

God
am i 
ortained  
to be 
in this 
palsy 
frame
for the
glory 
of 
your name
if so
Please let me 
know
where i am
supposed to 
go
yeah 
while 
blood 
still 
flow 
in my
 veins
or 
in my 
brain  
but father
quick question 
What am i 
supposed to 
gain
or what is 
the life 
lesson 
from this earth 
pain