WARNING: I AM WEARY

 Christ, what are you doing with my life?

Haven't I made enough of an earthly sacrifice?

Yeah, cerebral palsy is already hard 

Yeah, I have already been so emotionally scarred 

But still...

Your Will...

is to put more on me

But why?

Can't you see?

I'm hurtin'

Feelin' like a burden 

Yeah, I'm stressin' 

bein;  "a life lesson "

for "someone" 

yeah, bein' disabled...

is NO FUN 

yeah it goes way beyond 

not bein' able to walk or run 

yeah, I'm so ready to be done 

but my eyes saw the sun 

come up this morning 

BUT WARNING: 

I AM WEARY 

HUMAN CHARACTERISTICS

i am human 

but what am i doing? 

acting like a robot 

but that's gotta stop 

yeah because sometimes 

the sun doesn't shine 

and I hurt 

yeah sometimes I feel like dirt 

and I don't wanna put in the work 

of pretending 

yeah sometimes...

i don't feel like winning 

yeah sometimes...

i just feel like sitting 

yeah sitting...

in my sadness

or madness 

yeah sometimes.., 

gladness 

is nowhere to be 

yeah sometimes...

i get a little down 

on this earthly ground

yeah tears of a clown 

yeah sometimes ...

life hurts like a knife 

yeah, even when...

you believe in Christ

DISAPPOINTED

 OKAY 

the damage has been done 

I can't walk or run 

yet 

yeah the pavement wet 

but i can't feel it 

without getting some help 

and so i wept 

in-depth 

because 

my breath has so much life 

and love 

but i feel 

like a dead dove 

yeah, where is God's glove?

when i need it 

RIGHT STANDING OVATION

MAN

 

i wish that my breath 

could take care itself 

yeah because being disable 

is like death 

yeah from right to left 

I need someone 

and that is no fun 

yeah I so wanna be done 

yeah I wama run 

or walk 

or fly 

like  hawk 

that just been brought down 

to the ground 

of Earth 

yeah I wanna worth 

and a thrist

for 

more 

movement 

like a human 

yeah because what I'm doin' 

is ruinin' my life 

yeah cerebral palsy is no paradise 

and bein' able is right? 

THE DESIRE OF MY HEART RIGHT NOW

 Father God 

my desire is...

for my legs to be on fire 

yeah, moving on their on 

because there's nothing wrong 

yeah, Father, that's right 

no cerebral palsy insight

yeah, I could do...

whatever I like 

with no help 

so yeah, no longer will I wept 

in-depth 

yeah because no longer will I be ...

disable

yeah, a broken table

of sort 

yeah not really able to...

 play any sport 

yeah, no mean deck of cards 

yes Lord, this is the desire of my heart

MISSING MY DAD

MAN

I'm missing my dad 

BECAUSE 

I'm missing

what was 

and what will never be 

WELL 

what he will never see 

come from me 

or our family tree 

but he was the key 

to unlock my mommy 

and the funny

to unlock my heart 

yeah he played a big part 

of my start 

but now he's finished 

and his child 

ME

is trying hard 

to smile 

on the rest 

of her miles 

yeah while he's resting 

under stone 

but he's not resting

 alone 

NO

his spirit is at home 

BUT NO MORE 

phone calls 

BETWEEN US 

at all

AND THAT'S 

my downfall 

THROUGHOUT MY TEENAGE YEARS

 throughout my teenage years

i masked a lot of tears 

and fears 

yeah to young to drink beers 

so I switched gears and pitched 

a niche 

that was so solid 

that a hobbit   

would copy it 

and claim it 

as his main thang 

but I love to saug 

but I can't do it well 

but when I did 

as a kid 

my personal hell 

and the smell 

went away 

yeah the grey 

turned into happy heartburn 

and I learned 

to make friends  

when I had to pretend 

that I wasn't taken-aback 

by the fact 

that I am 

physically challenge 

DAMN

IN HIGH SCHOOL

MAN 

high school 

i wish i could 

go back  to you

and do the things  

I didn't do 

yeah, like hanging out 

with the cheerleading crew

or try some new 

like acting in a play 

and getting a guy to say 

"Hey, I like you much more than a friend"

"So when are we gonna stop "the pretend" 

"and commit the sin of havin' sex

yeah, I wish I would have flex 

that muscle 

yeah instead of just bein' 

on an academic hustle

but I  probably would have

gladly  settled for 

jus' some more laughs 

and a french kiss 

yeah I so miss 

days like this 

yeah days that didn't even

exist '

in that world 

for your girl 

back then 

but I so remember when 

IN MIDDLE SCHOOL

 MAN 

in middle school 

i felt like... 

such a fool 

when others saw me as cool 

but I drooled 

over a guy 

who never gave me try 

but I learned how to cry 

on paper 

so boy, 

I don't hatecha 

for not lettin' me datecha 

yeah' 'cause honestly 

I eventually found

poetry on ground 

so you see?

you dissin' me 

really set me free 

and really let me...

fly high and by  

EAST WASHINGTON

 East, 

i had trouble find peace 

when I was with you 

but somehow as a child 

I got through 

the glue 

that flew 

my way 

most days 

yeah the greys 

were a phase 

that amazed  me 

like crazy 

but life can be hazy 

with or without Christ 

yeah, nothing is always nice 

sugar can come with spice 

and dreams...

can come with screams 

MANSON ROAD

i sit in front of my computer 

for hours on end 

yeah wishin' I had...

 a romantic friend

to hold me when I cry 

or when I jus' wanna...

sigh 

out loud 

yeah with him 

as my crowd 

of witnesses 

yeah, I still wanna be...

in some bliss 

yeah, even in my mist 

of sadness 

I wanna feel...

real;;;

gladness 

in my grieve 

yeah, I long to release 

some peace 

WEST 23rd STREET

 i wanna run 

to Little Rock 

nonstop 

or hop like a rabbit 

while listening to Lenny Kravitz 

yeah I'm running away 

from all of my bad habits 

today 

yeah the sky 

is high 

and sunny 

but my heart 

feels real funny 

and grey 

so God may run?

from dusk to dawn 

to my best friend's house 

father, I have no spouse 

and that makes me feel 

like a louse

but she 

makes me 

feel better 

yeah in this crazy weather 

where nothing last forever  

I WANNA RUN

i wanna run 

but not from 

the police 

no, I wanna run 

to find some 

peace 

on this greasy

globe 

dear father 

wear is my robe 

of many colors 

yeah I want one 

just like my brothers 

and my former lovers

yeah because I've read your book 

from cover to cover 

and realize 

there will never be 

another me 

in your eyes 

but surprise 

I still 

want a thousand more 

tries 

to run 

into the sun 

and will it 

to be still 

JUST TRYING TO HOLD IT TOGETHER

 man

the sands are moving so fast 

in my hourglass 

my dad just passed 

and all I can think about 

is getting out 

yeah out of my skin 

and into some wind 

and some sun 

yeah boy, I just wanna run 

and have fun 

like an able body 

yeah, peaceful and naughty 

at the same time 

but committing no crime 

no, just being fine 

with whatever 

yeah and just trying to hold it

together